August 08, 2006
Part 2 - World Upside Down
When humans get tense, their dogs get nervous, too. So, I was getting plenty edgy in the back seat as Mike hunched over the steering wheel, shooting his questions through the darkness at Molly and hurling rebukes at the weaving headlights and tail lights whizzing all around us.
"What was the number of that exit again? Yo! Get off my ass, you Lexis-lusting, bumper-hugging, more-money-than-brains moron! Molly, you sure we didn't need to turn there? Slow down, numbnuts! Hey, Molly! Is this it? Right here? I mean left here?! Yeah, yeah. I'm merging already. Get off the crack, dude! Jeez Louise, Molly, where is this place?"
Then, as if crests of Mike's anxiety could roil the world around us, the whole landscape seemed to erupt. All day long, there'd been wide horizons and flat roads. Now, suddenly, the world turned vertical. It was as if a massive stream of cement had made a wrong turn and decided to bend high into the sky. This, I learned, was a bona fide human city, a place of manmade canyons and concrete pathways and high wires and bright lights and people pounding pavement.
We stopped the car, finally, at a place called the Holiday Inn. "They take dogs," Molly reassured me. "Take them where?" I wanted to ask. It was, after all, a scary place for your average suburban Labrador. A strange man came off the street and up to the window to ask Mike for something, and I instinctively barked and lunged. Don’t corner me, mister! It’s late and I’m anxious and nothing around here looks quite right.
But, by and by, I calmed down. Mike heaved the luggage out of the back of the car and we headed into the Inn, the humans both looking dog-tired. I, ironically, was the manic one now, utterly intrigued by the smiling night staffers and the potted plants and leather furniture. I was pulling Mike, who pulled a rolling suitcase, which in turn pulled another rolling suitcase. And, behind that one, Molly pulled yet another. I was the lead dog in a mini-Iditarod coursing through the lobby. There was so much to smell and so little time.
A sliding door opened in front of us and Molly told me to walk into the small room on the other side. I was most reluctant, smelling trouble of the human kind. Finally, I entered. The metal doors closed immediately behind me and the world shifted yet again in a manner most terrifying.
(to be continued...)
"What was the number of that exit again? Yo! Get off my ass, you Lexis-lusting, bumper-hugging, more-money-than-brains moron! Molly, you sure we didn't need to turn there? Slow down, numbnuts! Hey, Molly! Is this it? Right here? I mean left here?! Yeah, yeah. I'm merging already. Get off the crack, dude! Jeez Louise, Molly, where is this place?"
Then, as if crests of Mike's anxiety could roil the world around us, the whole landscape seemed to erupt. All day long, there'd been wide horizons and flat roads. Now, suddenly, the world turned vertical. It was as if a massive stream of cement had made a wrong turn and decided to bend high into the sky. This, I learned, was a bona fide human city, a place of manmade canyons and concrete pathways and high wires and bright lights and people pounding pavement.
We stopped the car, finally, at a place called the Holiday Inn. "They take dogs," Molly reassured me. "Take them where?" I wanted to ask. It was, after all, a scary place for your average suburban Labrador. A strange man came off the street and up to the window to ask Mike for something, and I instinctively barked and lunged. Don’t corner me, mister! It’s late and I’m anxious and nothing around here looks quite right.
But, by and by, I calmed down. Mike heaved the luggage out of the back of the car and we headed into the Inn, the humans both looking dog-tired. I, ironically, was the manic one now, utterly intrigued by the smiling night staffers and the potted plants and leather furniture. I was pulling Mike, who pulled a rolling suitcase, which in turn pulled another rolling suitcase. And, behind that one, Molly pulled yet another. I was the lead dog in a mini-Iditarod coursing through the lobby. There was so much to smell and so little time.
A sliding door opened in front of us and Molly told me to walk into the small room on the other side. I was most reluctant, smelling trouble of the human kind. Finally, I entered. The metal doors closed immediately behind me and the world shifted yet again in a manner most terrifying.
(to be continued...)
Comments:
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Hank, I'm telling you, motels are the worst. Wait until you hear someone out in the hallway at 3 in the morning and try to warn everybody. Talk about feeling unappreciated.
I can't believe how "doggie friendly" you guys are in the States - out here in Oz, dogs are so not allowed in motels or anywhere good like that ! That's it, I'm packing my lead and bed and moving to the U.S !!!
Love
Opy
Love
Opy
Hank! An elevator: it’s a weird thing, isn’t it? Simon has to go on one every day. It took a long time to get used to. And you are so right in that “When humans get tense, their dogs get nervous, too.” It’s one of the things that make family vacations so much more interesting…
Once again: nice writing! I will enjoy reading the continuation
Once again: nice writing! I will enjoy reading the continuation
the suspenders! I'm clutching at my picture of a circus poodle waiting for the next episode . . .
Cal :-)
Cal :-)
Hank~
we are proud of you Hank,
I can't wait to go on vacations with my humans,The motels that we stay at are AWESOME,And my mom dosn't have to make the bed,like she dose at home .And I can lay anywhere.Now elevators:that's a whole other matte.
Lots of Licks
Sam
we are proud of you Hank,
I can't wait to go on vacations with my humans,The motels that we stay at are AWESOME,And my mom dosn't have to make the bed,like she dose at home .And I can lay anywhere.Now elevators:that's a whole other matte.
Lots of Licks
Sam
Dear Hank--
I hope you don't forget to give Mike a big Happy Birthday lick to the face today!(08-17).
Gosh, in dog years, Mike is beyond ancient.
Woof!
Miss Daisy, the amazing shedding chow
I hope you don't forget to give Mike a big Happy Birthday lick to the face today!(08-17).
Gosh, in dog years, Mike is beyond ancient.
Woof!
Miss Daisy, the amazing shedding chow
hi hank! i've added a link from my blog to yours (if-u-don't-mind). i have never been on an elevator. i don't even go "down" long stairs...i'll go up. but not down. can't wait to read more about your adventures!
-*woof*
-*woof*
Hank I have to stay at a hotel soon too, hopefully the windows are soundproof. I can't stand noises at all hours of the morning. :)
WHAT HAPPENED!!!
Im goin freekin crazy here waiting for part 3!
PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE come back and finish the story Hank!
Im goin freekin crazy here waiting for part 3!
PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE come back and finish the story Hank!
just to let you know that im online again. mommy was in japan and saw the perfect mountainside for the "hank's meditation retreat". green, lush, and with a river to sit by to contemplate. --endo
Ah to be a dog.
I gave my dog a bath today, and she promptly went outside and tore the garbage up.
www.crashtestcomic.com
I gave my dog a bath today, and she promptly went outside and tore the garbage up.
www.crashtestcomic.com
Hey Hank,
Great travelogue! Did you get to the big cat box by the big waters? Hope you and your humans are okay.
I hate those liftin' boxes. Don't know if I'm comin' or goin'.
Did you do any nose surfin' while in the car or maybe produce some nose art? That's what I do on a long trip or short trip. Ruff!
Woof!
Freda
P.S. I'm barkin' all my buddies to vote for the photo of 'Flyer', number one two one two (12) in the BBC Photographer of the Year 2006 Competition at http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_
news/magazine/5348588.stm>BBC NEWS | UK | Magazine | Photographer of the Year 2006: Final Vote. Polls close Monday, 25 September. Thanks. Ruff! Ruff!
Great travelogue! Did you get to the big cat box by the big waters? Hope you and your humans are okay.
I hate those liftin' boxes. Don't know if I'm comin' or goin'.
Did you do any nose surfin' while in the car or maybe produce some nose art? That's what I do on a long trip or short trip. Ruff!
Woof!
Freda
P.S. I'm barkin' all my buddies to vote for the photo of 'Flyer', number one two one two (12) in the BBC Photographer of the Year 2006 Competition at http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_
news/magazine/5348588.stm>BBC NEWS | UK | Magazine | Photographer of the Year 2006: Final Vote. Polls close Monday, 25 September. Thanks. Ruff! Ruff!
Hey Hank,
I'm with the Big Dog here and am a bit worried. Hope all is well and that your ok.
Hope to hear more of your adventures soon.
Shannon
I'm with the Big Dog here and am a bit worried. Hope all is well and that your ok.
Hope to hear more of your adventures soon.
Shannon
Hank, I envy you. We never go on vacations with our humans, because they are always busy and we are trouble. Or so they say. What a dog's life...
greetings,
Thank You Very Much! Your posted was too nice and very knowlegeable to me as well as
informative. Thanks for sharing this and Keep up the good work..
More power,
Bunny Mendez
Dog Bark Collars
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Thank You Very Much! Your posted was too nice and very knowlegeable to me as well as
informative. Thanks for sharing this and Keep up the good work..
More power,
Bunny Mendez
Dog Bark Collars
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